Sunday, February 03, 2008
Beautiful Blue Eyes
It seemed strange to me, when, as a child, I heard some old recording artist lilting a song from my Dad’s version of the Top 40: “Beautiful, beautiful brown eyes. I’ll never love blue eyes again.” I remember thinking, as only a very egocentric (blue-eyed child) can think, “That’s weird. Blue eyes are the best color. Why would anyone like brown eyes over blue?!”
Now I’ve learned that I’m the product of a genetic mutation. That finding conjures up visions of white lab-coated mad scientists with unkempt hair and coke-bottle glasses stirring bubbling concoctions in test-tubes over a Bunsen burner, that transform normal, respectable people into those savage monsters that Will Smith battles in I Am Legend. My poor children. I’ve passed on this apparent aberration to three of them. Don’t be ashamed—it’s not your fault!
We’re victims. And now that the news is out, that blue-eyed people are a….dare I say it again…[shudder, wince]…a mutation, no doubt we will be subjected to unfair discrimination and persecution, when previously we enjoyed some degree of acceptance in society. Certainly the government should design a program to rectify this situation. At the very least, maybe our Congressmen should earmark funds to provide us with colored contacts.
Until then, perhaps I'll go Hollywood chic and keep my sunglasses on over my baby blues.
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